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Dear friends, I have decided to move on. Go to my new blog to read what is currently happening in MY life. Sank kyou!



Laugh all you want, but hear ye, hear ye -- believe it or not -- I am Kyouya-sempai of the Ouran High School Host Club fame.

Hosting Ron (female Ron, of course!) and Hermione

Kyouya-sempai at your service? (Service is intended only for groomed, beautiful and elite bishoujos only)


The Wonder of His Glory

I've been reading Psalm 103 lately as I needed to understand the context for thanking God for His goodness during Sunday worship. I was totally blown away. I've been EMO ever so lately and been running away from God -- and after some QT and confession, reading this psalm is like hearing God's voice from heaven blaring away. Wow, totally unexpected. Praise the Lord all my soul.

Psalm 103
Of David. 

1 Praise the LORD, O my soul;
       all my inmost being, praise his holy name.

 2 Praise the LORD, O my soul,
       and forget not all his benefits-

 3 who forgives all your sins
       and heals all your diseases,

 4 who redeems your life from the pit
       and crowns you with love and compassion,

 5 who satisfies your desires with good things
       so that your youth is renewed like the eagle's.

 6 The LORD works righteousness
       and justice for all the oppressed.

 7 He made known his ways to Moses,
       his deeds to the people of Israel:

 8 The LORD is compassionate and gracious,
       slow to anger, abounding in love.

 9 He will not always accuse,
       nor will he harbor his anger forever;

 10 he does not treat us as our sins deserve
       or repay us according to our iniquities.

 11 For as high as the heavens are above the earth,
       so great is his love for those who fear him;

 12 as far as the east is from the west,
       so far has he removed our transgressions from us.

 13 As a father has compassion on his children,
       so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him;

 14 for he knows how we are formed,
       he remembers that we are dust.

 15 As for man, his days are like grass,
       he flourishes like a flower of the field;

 16 the wind blows over it and it is gone,
       and its place remembers it no more.

 17 But from everlasting to everlasting
       the LORD's love is with those who fear him,
       and his righteousness with their children's children-

 18 with those who keep his covenant
       and remember to obey his precepts.

 19 The LORD has established his throne in heaven,
       and his kingdom rules over all.

 20 Praise the LORD, you his angels,
       you mighty ones who do his bidding,
       who obey his word.

 21 Praise the LORD, all his heavenly hosts,
       you his servants who do his will.

 22 Praise the LORD, all his works
       everywhere in his dominion.
       Praise the LORD, O my soul.

The Inevitable God

OK, I've just cosplayed. And, I'm asking myself: so what? Perhaps I am looking to get high in the whole event of cosplaying and not getting that thrill or either that, my expectation was so high that the experience from cosplaying left me a bad taste in my mouth. Either ways, I can't help to say it -- life's pretty meaningless after all. I could go on and on about the vanity of life and of its pleasures and still come back to the same conclusion of the Qoheleth of Ecclesiastes, 'Meaningless, meaningless'.

In all the hoo-hah of the week, leaving God out was the easiest. It's that easy to 'stare into nowhere, and can't feel the chains on' my soul. At the end of the day, life's just not worth living without Him. I can run, but I can never avoid the inevitable God. There is no other jealousy more terrible than that of God, who constantly chastises and confronts me whenever I veer towards other 'gods'.

The danger perhaps is not so much about doing too many activities at a time, but rather that of leaving God behind.

He's more than the laughter or the stars in the heavens
As close a heartbeat or a song on our lips
Someday we'll trust Him and learn how to see Him
Someday He'll call us and we will come running
and fall in His arms and the tears will fall down and we'll pray,

"I want to fall in love with You"

It seems too easy to call you "Savior",
Not close enough to call you "God"
So as I sit and think of words I can mention
to show my devotion

"I want to fall in love with You"

"my heart beats for You"

Just a Little Empty

I'm that kind of guy that's eager to try out all sorts of stuff. And today I'm feeling totally empty, exhausted. Well, the back story is: I've been hyped up about my cosplaying debut this Saturday and I've been here and there getting my costume ready... and I'm back home feeling pretty darn tired, wondering what the heck I've been doing all day long. I dunno if it's just a long day, but to me, I feel as if I'd done something wrong, something that's unnatural, perhaps? Funny thing is, I used to love to stay at home so much so that I fear going out. Now, that I'm out a lot of the time, I feel a deep longing to be back at home again. I AM home, but frankly, I feel as if I'd just murdered someone or did something really sinful. Hope the feeling fades.

A Little Prayer Request

Dear friends,

Here's a prayer request from my pet-sister and true sister-in-Christ from Hong Kong. Please pray for her:

Hey, I hope all of you have a GREAT summer!!!! I have a little favor to ask, I need you all to pray for MY MOM. Yesterday the doctor found a tumor in my mom's organ and we really hoping that it is not cancer. The doctor took some specimen to test, and the result won't come out till my birthday. My aunt had cancer in the same organ, so the chance of my mom having it is real high. So, I need you all to PRAY that it's not anything serious!!!! I'm so glad to have you guys as my close friends, and I thank YOU.
P.S. Oh, pray for Cecily too, she went throught some testings and had to stay over night in a hospital, I don't think it's too serious. I can give u an update on it later.
BTW: Cecily is our friend. She's not a Christian and we've been praying for her lots.

1) They decide to chew up your good pair of shoes just when you've had a terrible day.
2) They poop strategically that you would drive your car with your feet all covered with crap.

The Greatest Gift

Don't you hate it that when you get people gifts and they go like, "Oh, you shouldn't have" or "Wow, you're so rich ah?". I mean it's clearly understandable to receive such reactions and I mean I would react that way too, sometimes. But I guess, the crux is, we just hate receiving gifts. Breaking down to the gist of it all, we often feel guilty -- unworthy even -- and we'd think about, "What should I get so-and-so for his/her this-and-that to repay him/her for what he/her has given me". We feel guilty because we feel as if we owed that person something after receiving the gift(s). But what bothers us even more is the sad fact that many of us cannot afford to repay what that person has given us.

And it's certainly true when I swept one of my friends feet off the ground, literally, when I got him a quite expensive gift. For all the pranks that I've pulled, this one is THE most emotional. Truthfully, there's just no reason why I would go high and low to get him that present. There's no check list of what good he has done to merit that gift -- although, out of 'pai seh'-ness, I would have to digress. It's just one of those "Happy Random Present Days", where you'd just get things for people on your whims and fancy. Of course, like my Dad, I have to give it a lot of thought to it before buying and yes, I have to work my butt off for a long, long while. But it's worth it, I suppose. Sometimes, it's nice to pamper friends, sneakily and it's definitely worth it to endure their pleas of, "Ah, you shouldn't have".

At the end of the day, I realized amidst all the fun of giving, I too have been given a gift.... an even greater gift than the one I have given -- one that I've been neglecting all too easily. Apart from being EMO the whole day because of my mutt's destructiveness (she chewed my leather shoes up -- thanks, Autumn), I failed to keep in mind the most precious gift that a person has ever given to me. OK, setting aside our tendency to even accept this gift in the first place, don't we have an even bigger tendency to overlook this gift in the midst of our everyday life? Know what, this greatest gift is one that you know you can never repay (not in all eternity) and it makes you feel like a loser, if not a downright unworthy filth. And that gift is not one paid through any currency of the world but through the very life of the giver. Additionally, this gift is given only to those who don't even deserve it (and the fact is plain simple: everyone's just out of the game -- nobody deserves it)

Next time I receive any gifts, I will try not to be swept off my feet so as to displace this gift as less that THE greatest gift. Next time I choose to give, I will try to remember that I can never give enough to actually give myself in the process. This is the greatest and most awesome-mest gift: Jesus Christ.

"For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son..." John 3:16

Kaeri Taku Nai Yo!

In 4 more weeks, I'll be flying back to the States. Kaeri taku nai yo! (I don't wanna go back!)

The prospect of going back to the States scares me a little. Maybe that sort of says a lot about me -- yes, I'm enjoying my time here. Oh well, the part of growing up is to, sometimes, do the things seemingly contrary to our feelings. I've never quite grasp the idea of letting go and letting God. I feel vulnerable and yet I know I'm helpless without Him.

Psalm 139:16 says, ' In Your book they all were written, the days fashioned for me' Is there a reason not to trust in the God who not only shapes me into who I am but also the One who actually molds each and every single day that I live in -- both the good days and the EMO days?

It's hard but I'm gonna give it a shot. For all I know, I might repeat 'Kaeri taku nai yo!' just before coming back to Malaysia next year.

Lunged into Hot Lava

I would regret it if I didn't record the moment where I lunged into hot lava today. Well, not literally per se, but Ken and I were playing Soul Calibur and it happen in a way that I used Taki who has a move where she shots up into the air and lunges at her opponents. Unfortunately, I was so close to the edge of the arena that the lunge landed me in hot lava.

Soul Calibur tip no #253: Never use Taki's air lunge attack near the edge of any stages.